I love God more than ever

its scary.

no this is not yet another horror lamo Russel Lee story.

it is about my lingering shadow.

my past.

it follows me everywhere i go. yes i have turned away from it by facing the Light. but it is still lingering behind. Darn it.

i see my past as a blood hound.terrifying?

i have changed.but my past hasn't. they just have to dig up my past.i dun like the least of it.

i noe im being scrutinised.i noe.like "c'mon dun fake it. u change? i dun believe it"

i hope i break away from my shadow. is it even possible?

I WATCHED SPIDERMAN 2 with Ken zhiyang. hahax. cool huh..He(as in spiderman u noe) is real real super cool. i wish i had his abilities..Fat hOPE HuH. HAHAHA..

yup..and kissing upside down seems real "crazy"...but it is real sweet too. hehx. im gonna try it when im ready. ahhahaha..

he swings,*ahbish**kaboom**crasheeess*!! whoah! way to g Spidey!

------>>>im thinking of someone.who is it?all are just dreams..

~~~i'll be dreaming of u tonight..till tomorrow...i'll be holding u tight......and there's no where in the world i rather be..here in my room dreaming about u and me...~~~

late in the night when all the world is sleeping...i stay up and think of u....but u did not come up to me and say "i love u"....
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im feeling loads today...

so i shall write more...

lets talk about the times when i was hurt?

i fell of the highest canyon u can imagine.i fell like there was no tomorrow,into the ruins of my life.i do not know who pushed me.

whoah...but then she came and pull me up to the highest cliff,encouraged me to try climbing mountains again...but my belay rope was suddenly and mercilessly cut off. by her..and i fell again...screaming silently all the way.

my life was thoroughly smashed up.

it is amusing to see ppl around me nowadays taking things and people for granted. behaving like the whole world owes them. actually these ppl make me wan to puke.

of all i have gone thru..i dun even dare i have been thru sh*t. yet some ppl think they have been thru hell. tsktsk.

oh ya..i was falling...and u noe wat...Jesus came and broke the fall.
He took on my pain..yup..my hurts..my tears..

heex. now im fine. i would still be in bad bad shape if hadnt for Jesus...i would still think that i was right in my ways if hadnt for God.

HoHo.funny how some ppl can reject God when He is only good to us. for me..i really saw the beauty of God. haha!

all the Heavens shout Your praise...

Beautiful is our God...

The universe will sing

Hallelujah...to You our King!!!!!

finally, after so long, i feel it.
the Lure of the World. The Prince of this World, The Father of Lies.

im confused, perplexed, and all the works.

ARGH!

im faithful, yet i love the ways of the world sometimes.

is this the kinda paradox which is significantly present thru out the Bible?

i guess not.?

i love God.

hmmm...i always ask God for a heart of flesh.i do make sure i do not harden my heart.i noe..becos if i hardened my heart,i will nv come back..(thats disastrous)..

God..this is my cry..i hope You see it.i know You do.

Help me get away from the Lure of the World. let me touch You so that i might be empowered again... jus let me glimpse a bit of Your Glory... Give me the strength oh Lord.. Guard my heart from enemies of God.i love You...